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In a hospital cardiac unit, two women cross swords over the care of a corporate executive: his 50-something wife and his 20-something mistress.
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EXCERPT
[LILY, an elegant 50-something, and JENNIFER, a sleek, corporate
20-something, meet in the hallway of a cardiac ward outside a
patient's room. The sinister beep of machines.]
LILY
Prognosis. It's all a bit of a blur, let me get my Cliff's
Notes. (she reads) "100% blockage in two arteries,
90% in two others. Angioplasty would have been iffy, so they
did a quadruple bypass, but only after they stabilized him."
Which wasn't easy, apparently, he was flopping around like a
flounder.
JENNIFER
Jesus.
LILY
Did you know they turn grey? Grey and waxy, it's very disconcerting.
JENNIFER
Jesus! But he's...
LILY
Alive? Yes, though he barely looks it. Awake? Not yet. Capable
of speech? Don't know, they just took his tube out.
JENNIFER
Oh my God, poor Miles,
LILY
Capable of erection? I wouldn't know, you tell me.
JENNIFER
Excuse me?!?
LILY
Oh, dear, that just popped out. Caregiver stress, they call
it, just pretend you didn't hear it and I'll pretend I didn't
say it.
JENNIFER
How can you say a thing like -- ?
LILY
Oh don't be boring, Jennifer, we haven't time. Our Lord and
Master has been carved up like a Christmas turkey, let's cut
to the chase.
JENNIFER
We're colleagues, Mrs. Mitchell,
LILY
Colleagues.
JENNIFER
I'm on the acquisition team, we've been working very closely,
(LILY laughs, a short but very loud bray.)
JENNIFER
I was just...hoping to see him.
LILY
Well, I'm afraid he can't see any "colleagues",
Jennifer. Not right now. Only intimates. Because we intimates
are the ones who get the happy slappy fun job of putting Humpty
Dumpty back together again.
JENNIFER
God, this is a nightmare.
LILY
Yes, it's inconvenient as hell and totally unfair. I've got
an opera benefit in five weeks. And look at poor you. One minute
he's a master of the universe and you're his jolly hatchet-wielding
handmaiden, zooming all over the globe with him -- your thighs
get damp just thinking about it, I'll bet. The next minute, boom,
he's grounded, not even in the game, and there you are out in
Japanese corporate limbo, facing the karaoke alone. Well, that's
men for you.
(CONTINUES)
Order
a scriptAlso included in INTIMATE RELATIONS
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JENNIFER
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